The Well Behaved Goat

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He went from being a cute little guy to something of a nuisance.  Like an oversized six year old, giggling and trying to wrestle, he started pushing me around.  It was unfortunate that my back was against the metal bars of the stall.  I could practically feel the bruises forming!  His horns, thankfully nubs, were happily slamming into my hip as if I were another little boy goat wanting to play.  I could not push him very far, he was definitely stronger than me.  And as I was intermittently yelling for Doug and cussing at the six year old, I started thinking about when we get our own farm animals.

I imagined myself with a whole herd of unruly goats, throwing me into bars and permanently damaging my hip.  We were pet sitting for our friends at the time.  Doug just laughed when I told him because the day before the same goat had got him right in the stomach and I had at the time….laughed.  There’s karma for ya.  The goats are rescues from the Denver Zoo.  Nubians, the size of a very large dog, the mentality of a pre-schooler, and the escapee smarts of Houdini.  My friend, Nancy, says that it was just bad behavior on that goat’s part and that her Nubians do not do any such thing.  I did think that we could maybe get dwarf Nubians.  Doug said they will just take out our kneecaps instead!

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We really like goats though.  We tend to choose the naughtiest kitten at the shelter to bring home, the misfit dogs, etc.  We laugh at the goat’s antics (maybe because they don’t belong to us!) and watch their ever-childlike silliness.  We would like a few of our own.  We do not want any part in supporting factory farms and it would be nice to have our own daily milk that can be turned into butter or cheese or buttermilk or any number of dairy wonders that we generally refrain from!  How nice to add to my routine twice daily milkings.  The feel of a new baby in my arms like the one Emily is holding in the picture.  That was taken at Nancy’s house last year when her goats gave birth to two sets of triplets.  It was cute overload.  It was something I would like to see at our homestead one day.

Now, if I don’t want to get into the milk business, just provide for me and Doug and straggling children and grandchildren, how much do I really need?  Will a dwarf Nubian give, say two tablespoons of milk per day or a gallon?  What other breeds are there?  Is there a goat that can give fiber and good milk?  Please share any experiences you have had, friends.  Where in the world is my wonderous, well behaved, friendly, milk giving, fiber giving, hornless goat?